I haven't had many problmes with anxiety this year. I actually was starting to feel like that was old hat- all the normal triggers weren't working like they used to. But today it was back. Irrational fear, really, of yuckiness. I feel like someone is just waiting behind the next corner to jump out and hold out a sign that announces to the world what a fraud I am.

This morning it happened first during lecture where my advisor was guest lecturing and the arch nemesis was sitting in the corner. Then I had a brief break where I had to try to corner the two of them and get them to agree on a time to meet. icky.

then I had class number two with the arch nemesis. she just gets me all wound up like a top. it's bad. When I left school today it felt like I was about to explode.

it feels awful.

and now I just had a class with a person who works at the place that I might want to work. and I got all anxious again. and I still feel anxious. it's bad- really bad.

maybe I better get some work done so I don't feel like I'm setting myself up for failure.

blech.